In the dark you tell me of a flower, That only blooms in the violet hour

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

follow the yellow brick road and chase the rabbit down the hole

Hello blog, it is getting longer and longer between our visits. I haven't forgotten you though ((hug))
I always think of you on nights that can't sleep........like now.

Delima: Here I sit in Houston, i'm supposed to be happy, I thought I would be. I was so sure in fact I gave up on my dreams that were finally happening and my house that I loved. I'm working on it, its just that so soon after being here I feel very second place and very lied to and kept in the dark right now. i'm not used to feeling this way, I had been so careful up till now on who I chose, And I find myself confused and trying not to bolt out the door. So far though i'm still here. Which means I love him, but how long can these games last? I love that noone reads this because it feels really good to say it. I just feel like slowly little pieces of me are dying and dropping off.....I haven't been to church in months! That's not me, I love church. I'm lost right now and I don't know how to reel me back in. I don't know this person I am right now. what makes it all so horrible is I think I may have done this for something I imagined to be stronger than it really is....but once again love locks me in place and I am frozen here scared to move or it all might shatter.

Probably too dramatic you are thinking, well I agree.that is why I only type it here. Sometimes I wish I were made out of stone, the hard cold kind that can make it through anything.
~glory

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